Letting strangers in.....

Do you think strangers come into our lives for a reason?

Yesterday, a chance meeting made me question whether I believe that things….or people, appear like magic when we need that little extra something…..

I’ve discovered on my journey of challenges and grief that who we surround ourselves with, who we hold on to, can have a huge effect on surviving, well, almost anything.

Yesterday I took Dempsey to our favorite park.  Purple wisteria vines were dripping with blossoms.

It’s difficult to describe wisteria’s unique beauty and perfume unless you’ve seen one in full bloom.

They make me think of my mum…one of her favorite things...

So with the sun warming my back, feeling kinda surrounded by Spring, I took out my book, watching Dempsey unpack her shovel and pail and jump rope.

A young couple sat behind me, their newborn in a stroller parked up beside them…the wife sitting cross legged on a blue rug while her husband read her verse out of the Bible…I should’ve known it wouldn’t be a normal park outing!! :)

Dempsey is like a magnet with other kids….it wasn’t even five minutes after we arrived when a pretty little blonde girl shyly buddied up to her…and as you do when you’re that age, you become fast friends.

I sat there watching Demps interact with this little girl, sharing her skipping rope…smiling and making small talk.

Usually, watching her with other kids’ manages to squeeze my heart…that her sister isn’t here.

And while yelling to Dempsey to make sure she shared, an older lady sitting not far away spoke up…in my direction!

The conversation went like this….

“Are you Australian? I’m Rose by the way…”

“Yes, I am….but we live here.”

“Oh, I thought so, is your husband Australian too? Do you have family live close by?”

“No, my husband is an Aussie too. We don’t have any family here, just friends…”


For the next few minutes we chatted....until the lady’s next question.

“Gee, you must miss your Mum?”

Now this is when it gets funny, because I usually hide my story or who I am from strangers, you know, leave ‘stuff’ out, the sad ‘stuff’….especially with ones I meet in a park!

But this lady had such a warm energy about her; she reminded me of my mum…I could tell she was kind and loving from her smile and her warm energy.

So I told her that yes, I miss my mum every day, but that she died a while ago now.

And I don’t know why I do this when I tell people that but I sorta felt awkward, like this lady would feel uncomfortable and make an escape within seconds.

But she didn’t.

She got up, walked over and started chatting more to me. Asking me whether I had a sister….which I thought was odd, that she didn’t ask about a brother or my dad?

And automatically, I sort of made this weird giggle, nervous sound….as I contemplated…should I tell her about my sister Tarnia? And it was strange but I felt very comfortable with this lady….so I shared.


However, she didn’t run away, she kept talking, asking me what happened to Tarina….did she have children etc etc.

Then she said her daughter had lost a child last year, a premmy of 28 weeks.   And she told me how awful it was to lose a child.   And I wanted to say, “I know!”   And for a while I listened and comforted her and the conversation turned to…. “Is Dempsey your only child?”

It only took a second to decide I’d share Savannah’s story…  But I always feel awkward, telling strangers about all 3 of my losses, it usually turns me into some sort of freak.

And I could see behind her sunglasses, her eyes were full of tears.

What she did next surprised me and I’ve never had a stranger do it but she said… “Oh I feel like I should give you a hug…can I?”

I almost leapt out of my seat.

She hugged me so hard my neck clicked! :)

We sat together for the next 2 hours talking about life and I felt like I’d had a chat with my mum.

Dempsey was happily playing on the slide with Rose’s granddaughter when I realized we had to go. Rose then piped up and said  “Would you like to go to lunch next week?”

I patted her shoulder and told her she was sweet to ask, but I felt odd…here was this stranger, reaching out, offering me support....in the middle of a park on a sunny Spring afternoon…and I wondered, “Do I let this stranger into my life?”

She rummaged through her hand bag for a pen, asking me for my number….”Maybe if you don’t want to do lunch, we can go walking together? I’d really like that” she said.

And I didn’t even hesitate before I answered “I’d like that too!”

When I got into my car, I choked up, my eyes filled with tears as I waved Rose goodbye. I don’t know why, probably because she reminded me so much of my mum and what I’m missing…also, talking about everything sometimes have a habit of stirring up old emotions.

But Rose didn’t have an agenda, just another mother who is caring, who took the time to offer support to a stranger. Who has the ability to make a difference…we all do…

Rose text me this morning and we’re going walking tomorrow…around the hills near my home. :)


Sometimes old friends help us through our ‘stuff’ and sometimes its new friends. For in the blink of an eye life can change…we just hold on and see where this journey takes us…

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