These have been my best friends the past few days...............
Cough drops, bottles upon bottles of icy water and a box of tissues......I've learnt it's a true skill to pull out just one without scoring ten!
I've been sick with the flu....miserable! My cough sounds like a seal who's escaped Sea World and I smell like the inside of a Vick's Vapor Rub jar! :) But today, I'm getting better thank goodness!
For the past 4 days I haven't been motivated to climb out of bed, let alone jump on my laptop....and I told Peter I felt like I was dying.... "It's Swine Flu!" I told him!
I was struggling to catch my breath Saturday night...had the chills, which made me rug up deep under the covers....then within minutes, throw all the blankets off in a sweaty mess, gasping and barking!
I'd forgotten what it's like to be sick....flu'y sick!
Dempsey was her usual caring self. She wants to be a Doctor when she grows up. So she took over the medical duties...feeling my forehead with her hand and telling me I had a temp, and nagging me not to forget to drink water, soda or orange juice..."But not wine or coca cola Mummy!" she stated! She also shared her 'Healing Bear' who she cuddles every night....I felt privileged! :)
And the whole experience made me think of my beautiful Mum!
Not just how I miss her smoothing my forehead like she did when I was ill,....or how she made me feel better with a cold glass of fizzy seven-up and her delicious lamb shank soup. No, it made me reflect on how she must've felt when she was unwell.....when she was actually dying.
For those days I was stuck in bed, I thought about Mum's strength and the fearlessness she faced her illness with. She never complained about how sick she must've felt, of her suffering....of the fluid building inside her body. No, she was an advocate for living! And, while she coped with all the physical side affects cancer brings, there was also the mental side of watching me agonize over Savannah's fatal diagnosis....
She maintained a tidy house, cooked dinner for my sister's growing children and woke during the night to bottle feed twin babies...... How can I not draw strength from her fine example?
Yes, while lying in bed all weekend, watching the 'Food Network,' I dissected the "What ifs".....
"What if the flu was deadly?"
"What would I do with my precious time?"
"Have I done the things in life I want to?"
"What would I change if I only had a certain amount of time left?"
And we should all think like that everyday....that today may be our last....and take advantage of the days we are blessed with.
I also thought of a lovely lady in Sydney who's battling cancer....she doesn't complain either.... And I don't want to wait for a disastrous diagnosis, or any diagnosis to give me a slap in the face and remind me to appreciate what I have.
I know being sick with a an insignificant flu reminded me to enjoy being well! To make some changes to my life, like setting the alarm an hour earlier so I can go for a run before I attack the kitchen in the morning...amongst other things.... And to make a list...not a grocery one, a list of what I want to do with my precious time!
And of course, feeling better today, I did the one thing I love to do most....tickle Demps and listen to that unadorned, magic giggle! If only I could bottle it! She is the best medicine of all....